Will Therapy During Divorce Help Or Hurt Your Kids

From the moment you come home from the hospital with a new baby until the day you depart this earth your kids are your number one priority. So if you are getting divorced it is only natural to wonder what type of impact the case might have on your children. Just like every case is different, every child is different. The way your children process the fact their parents are getting divorced depends on a variety of factors. If you are uncertain about how to handle difficult questions about your divorce it can be helpful to enlist the help of a qualified counselor or therapist. Many times your children will open up to a therapist in ways they will not with you and this can be beneficial because it helps to identify areas of concern.

Many counselors agree that there are certain key areas to address when talking about divorce with the children. Putting these things on the top of your list will help your kids make the transition better and will give them the reassurance they need to make it through their parents’ divorce as happy and well-adjusted children:

  • Continue to let your kids know the divorce is not their fault. Children tend to place blame on themselves when things change and this can be especially true when their family dynamic is taking a drastic change. Encouraging words and continued support when your kids express an interest in certain activities helps your children to feel as though they are still accepted in and valued in the family.
  • Put on a brave face, even when you don’t feel strong. It is important for kids to see their parents as a safe haven and a place to go with questions or concerns. If you are falling apart at the seams your kids will feel uncomfortable coming to you for help. The alternative may be for your child to turn to a friend or begin engaging in socially unacceptable behavior.
  • Provide consistency and structure as much as possible, a good starting place for doing this is with the visitation and custody arrangements. If you can stick to the plan on a consistent basis your kids will know what to expect. Just like when they were babies and craved a set schedule, kids of divorce need to know what their plans include.

We understand divorce is an emotionally trying time, and it is not always possible to leave your feelings at the door. If you are struggling more than you feel is healthy for yourself and/or for your children it can be helpful to attend counseling sessions together. By going to a therapist with your kids you set a good example and teach your children that it is OK to ask for help. It is also critical to find an attorney you are comfortable with and who will listen to your needs as your case progresses. If you are considering divorce or have been served with divorce papers, call our office for help. Our approach is to let you tell your story and then provide suggestions on how to best reach resolutions that meet your needs.

For answers to your questions about divorce, consult a qualified legal professional. Call the Deaton Law Firm in Cypress at (916) 608-8891 to schedule your appointment today.

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